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Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Complications - Can u ever trust someone ?
Life is complicated .. People are complicated ..
In life, u'll always meet back-stabbers one day ..
In life, u'll always have to make choices ..
In life, every choice u make makes a difference ..
In life, u choose this u leave out the other ..
In life, if u only have two friends to choose .. u'd rather not choose
In life, if u choose one, the other will be unhappy ..
In life, its hard to stick to ur own principles ..
In life, u'll always be influenced no matter wad ..
In life, its hard to find true and loyal friends ..
In life, its saddest when ur most trusted friend betrays u ..
In life, people really do change .. greatly at times ..
In life, its all about backstabbin and betrayin ..
In life, there is no "good" side and "bad" side ..
In life, its hard to make decisions when both sides have their points ..
In life, its hard to remain neutral ..
Juz realised what 1 year of absence can have so many happennings ..
Its hard to believe tat people can change so drastically ..
Its hard to believe tat our once united squad has now become a squad where ppl backstab one another .. where ppl fight against one another .. and where ppl dislike one another ..
So much for "U have to know ur squadmates well as they will be with u for the 4 years in Npcc" tat i heard from the NCOs in sec1..
I really dont know wad happened during my absence tat resulted in such a great increase in disagreements and such a great decrease in unity ..
I wonder .. wad would have happened and our things would have been different if i didnt leave for france for tat one year .. would things have been better ? Or would things be the same ? Or worse .. would I have taken a side and joined in the fight ?
Well now .. I feel like im a two-faced freak ..
I have chosen to be neutral .. but is tat really wad i should be ?
I read WeiX's blog yesterday .. made me reflect alot ..
What he says is true ..
Quote :
"I have realised that neutral party is the worst. They go to one side and say I love u and go to the other side and say I love u too. End up both sides realised that the neutral parties are betraying them and woo .. no one is NEUTRAL."
Sounds like .. totally me ?
But once again .. like i said .. I cant choose a side ..
I cant choose one and forget the other ..
Especially if both sides are fighting against one another ..
I cant leave neither .. when i have friends i cherish in both sides ..
although i have to admit .. both sides have betrayed me too ..
At least everyone in NP have back-stabbed me once ..
It would be downright lying if u say u've never backstabbed me before ..
Two of my trusted friends have back-stabbed me too ..
And u say u've nv backstabbed me ? think again ..
Its hard to trust anyone when u have ppl like that around ..
Life is filled with uncertainty and ur trusted friends or ur best friend may just suddenly turn on u .. or worse .. they dont turn on u in the face but rather they backstab u from behind ..
In life .. the worse injury one can have .. is not any of the physical injuries .. but rather .. being backstabbed by ur friends from behind .. ( thinking that they were protecting u from the back )
Its like pushing a dagger deep into ur heart .. without u knowing tat the blade was coming ..
To tell the truth .. I'd rather ppl stab me from the front .. at least i might be able to dodge the blade .. in the more sophisicated term .. its knowing that ur friend have betrayed u and then, being stabbed rather than being stabbed first, then know tat it was ur friend who stabbed u .. Although in both cases, ur heart will be broken, but for scenario 1, i believe one would recover so much faster .. and life wouldnt seem so bad all at once ..
Know wad ? Maybe i should juz create a new side ? The neutral side!
Since everyone in the squad have already chosen their sides .. maybe i should juz stick to my side alone .. currently, anyone reading this post would feel that i'm still being tat two faced freak who says i love u to both sides and then backstab both sides by telling the other side about what they said .. seriously .. even i have this feeling like im the worse guy ever ..
But i seriuosly cant choose a side .. cuz i have friends on both sides -.-
But i'll try hard not to be a backstabber .. and stick to my "I do not backstab" campaign lolz ..
I juz hope i can be on both sides .. say i love u to both sides .. but not betray any of the sides .. maybe i should really try tat .. and see how's the outcome ..
Hahas .. to whoever is reading my post .. can imagine u telling others something like .. Nicholas really is a fcking blablabla .. so fake blablabla and all tat .. haiz .. life is never a smooth road ahead ..
*Anyways .. i dont think people in my squad reads my blog hehe .. I havent blogged for a very long time .. so i think even if they know they also wont see le .. hahas .. Cant believe i wrote so much .. was juz releasing everythin out from my heart .. now i feel much better =)
Haiz .. hoping to find a true friend one they .. a friend who doesnt talk bad bout u .. a friend who trust in u and whom i trust too .. the mutual trust between us so strong that none can break .. a friend who will stand up for u when ur backstabbed .. a friend who will always be with u no matter what .. a friend who's always thr for u .. a friend who will console u when ur down, who'll celebrate with u when ur high .. as the chinese saying goes, 有福同享，有难同当.. hahas .. i would be over the moon if i find one .. but does such a friend really exist in this world of complications ?
posted at : 11:52 AM
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